To find true love, the best thing I ever did was sit down after a breakup and got clear about what I wanted in a long-term partner. It helped me clearly see why my exes were not a good fit for me and what I should be looking for in a person to date. The information I walked away with, helped me say no to dates I knew were not right for me and eventually find true love with an amazing person. If you want to find true love, these journal prompts can help you get crystal clear on what true love will look like for you and how you can find it.
1. What Are The Top 3 Character Traits You Want In A Partner?
By defining the character traits you want in a partner, you will get a better sense of who would be a good fit for you long-term. This can help you weed out bad dates and eventually find the person that you want to spend your life with.
2. What Are Your Relationship Dealbreakers?
What are the things that you will NOT accept in a relationship? By getting clear on your dealbreakers, you will save yourself a lot of time and heartache by not getting involved with someone that is not right for you.
For instance:
- Disrespect
- Laziness
- Controlling behavior
- Addiction to something
3. What Are Your Relationship Goals?
What do you want to achieve in your relationship? For instance, do you want to get married, have kids, or travel the world together?
By getting clear on your relationship goals, you will be able to find someone who fits into them.
4. How Do You Want To Be Treated In A Relationship?
How do you want to be treated by your partner? With respect, kindness, and love?
When you get clear on how you want to be treated, you will stop putting up with being treated in a way that you don’t like or desire.
5. What Kind Of Relationship Do You Want?
Do you want a committed relationship or something more casual?
This is important to get clear on. For instance, if you want a committed relationship, acknowledging that will help you avoid those people who are obviously not ready to settle down. You won’t assume that you can change them or that maybe they will change their mind down the road (which rarely happens), and you will move on looking for someone who wants to be committed too.
6. What Are Your Non-Negotiables In A Relationship?
What are the things that you will not compromise on in a relationship? By getting clear on your non-negotiables, you will be able to find someone that is compatible with you and that you can have a happy and healthy relationship with.
For instance:
- Must love dogs
- Must enjoy travel
- Must have a job!
7. How Much Time Do You Want To Spend With Your Partner?
Do you want to spend every waking moment with your partner, or do you need some space?
Be honest. Whatever you want is fine, but you need to be able to articulate it to potential partners so that you can find out if you are on the same page.
8. What Do You Want To Do Together?
What are the things that you want to do with someone you love?
For instance, do you want to:
- Take personal development classes together
- Build hobbies together
- Travel together every weekend
- Spend every evening together
- Have dinner at the dinner table
9. What Are Your Personal Future Plans?
Knowing what you want in your future can help you find true love. It can help you clearly explain who you are and where you are headed so that the right person knows a good thing when they see it.
10. What Do You Need From A Relationship?
What do you need from your partner in order to be happy and fulfilled?
Do you need attention, support, or affection?
11. What Are Your Expectations For The Relationship?
What do you expect from your partner in the relationship?
For example, shared chores or equality?
12. What Are Your Communication Needs In A Relationship?
How much communication do you need from your partner in order to feel close and connected?
Do you need complete honesty in the relationship? Even if the truth hurts?
By getting clear on your communication needs, you will be able to find someone that can meet those needs.
13. What Are Your Emotional Needs In A Relationship?
What do you need from your partner emotionally in order to feel loved and supported?
Some examples of being emotionally supported in a relationship are feeling understood, having someone to confide in, and feeling like you’re part of a team.
It’s important to have a partner who is there for you both physically and emotionally, and who makes you feel valued and loved.
14. What Are Your Sexual Needs In A Relationship?
What do you need from your partner sexually in order to feel satisfied and fulfilled?
Some examples of sexual needs in a relationship are feeling desired and wanted, feeling comfortable and relaxed with sex, exploring new things together, and being impulsive.
15. What Are Your Financial Needs In A Relationship?
How do you want to handle finances in the relationship?
Some examples of financial needs in a relationship are joint bank accounts, shared bills, and agreeing on budget restrictions.
Often, couples will need to communicate about what their financial goals are and come up with a plan that works for both of them. Without this communication, money can often become a source of tension in a relationship.
16. What Are Your Family Plans?
Do you want to have kids or are you okay with not having kids, or are you open to either way? How do you want to raise kids?
This can cause a lot of problems later on in the relationship if you are not on the same page.
17. What Are Your Religious Beliefs?
Do you have the same religious beliefs or are you okay with different religious beliefs?
18. Is It OK If Someone Has Different Political Views Then Me?
Can you be in a relationship with someone that has different political views than you? Again, this is something that can cause a lot of problems later on in the relationship if you are not on the same page.
19. What Are My Views On Monogamy?
Are you monogamous or polyamorous? Are you willing to experiment, or do you know that you will be one way or the other for life?
20. How Do I Want My Partner To Treat My Friends And Family?
Do you want your partner to be friends with your friends and family or do you want them to keep their distance?
This isn’t something we often think about, but our personal relationships can affect our love relationships in a big way. If you get together with someone who isn’t a good match with your family and friends (either wanting more than they can give or wanting less than they want to give) then there will be a lot of tension down the line.
Then again, if you find true love, are you willing to accept that the relationship between your partner and friends, and family may not work out the way you (or they) want?
21. What Are Your Pet Peeves?
What are the things that bother you or that you can’t stand? It is important to know these things about yourself so that you can find someone that is compatible with you and that doesn’t have any of those things.
22. What Do I Want My Partner To Be Like?
Do you have a list of qualities that you want your partner to have? If so, it is important to find someone that has those qualities.
Try visualizing the perfect person for you.
What do they do in a day?
What are they like?
What are they passionate about?
23. What Am I Willing To Compromise On?
There are always going to be things that you are not going to agree on, so it is important to know what you are willing to compromise on. This way, you can find someone who you can work through differences with.
24. What Do I Need To Be Happy In A Relationship?
What do you need in order to be happy in a relationship? When it comes to true love, it is important to find someone that can provide those things for you.
25. What Does True Love Look Like To Me?
Take some time to visualize what true love looks like to you. This will help you get clear on what someone would look like who could offer you true love and it will make it easier to see it when it comes along.
26. How Willing Am I Not To Rush Into Things?
Often first experiences with someone don’t show you the whole picture of who they are. Sometimes you can tell if they are not right for you right away, but because they are on their best behavior and will often show you what you want to see, it may not be clear right away.
Can you take your time to get to know someone to make sure they are right for you?
27. How Willing Am I To Be Myself While Dating?
The best way to find true love is to be yourself. Don’t try to change who you are in order to please someone else; if they can’t accept you for who you are, then they’re not going to work out to be true love in the end.
28. How Willing Am I To Change Course If Need Be?
Sometimes we get into a relationship thinking we have found true love, but soon we realize that’s not the case. Many people find it easier to stay in the relationship than change course and leave it. That’s when true love goes out the window.
Are you willing to put in the effort to find true love? Will you take the easy way or recognize when things aren’t working out and move on to find something that will?
29. What Do I Need To Work On To Find True Love?
If you have poor relationship skills, then you will have a hard time finding true love. For instance, if you are obsessively jealous or a workaholic, then it’s going to be hard to focus on maintaining a healthy relationship full of love.
What do you know, based on past relationships, you have to work on?
30. How Can I Meet More New People?
If you want to find true love, you have to meet new people. That perfect person is out there, but if you don’t get out there and socialize, you won’t find them.
In short, you need to be willing to get out there and socialize!
- Join a club or group that interests you.
- Attend social events or gatherings.
- Join an online forum or group.
- Strike up a conversation with someone new.
- Take a class or join a recreational sports league.
Do what you need to do to get yourself in front of as many options as possible, and you will have an easier time finding true love with that perfect person.
